Let It Begin #3: Face-First in the Mud.
COMING HOME
by B.C
Leaving home coming home
Leaving Mother and Father to see mother and father
Different and non-different
One and the same
Feels like forever
But old-habits just the same
But this home is everywhere
Like fire in wood
The Lord is everywhere
And your service to him is unlimited.
Going home coming home
Only the mercy of your lotus feet keeps me absorbed.
Greetings from the glove-shaped apparatus that is the state of Michigan. For this young bhatka, the first trip back into the material world was a bit of a slap in the face. More like a solid jab straight into my now broken nose. So far, staring straight up at the mountain-top where true Krsna consciousness resides, I am just scaling the first stalagmites below. Enthusiasm dulled, confidence a mask, and my patience a string blowing in the wind. I take a step ahead, my mind firmly somewhere else in maya’s grasp, and find nothing with my foot, falling forward to land straight on my scarred hand and knees. Too much
false humility…..this instant karma is getting you.
I wanted to go home after being at Home for such a short time leaving with the feeling that I must return to New Vrindavan, not that I have to. I certainly am feeling that heavy separation, the weight of wasted time that must be made up. I long for the association of devotees of all shapes, manners, and sizes. I know I literally can’t survive without it. My creeper has been stepped on, by my own foot, but as far as I can tell it’s still bouncing back up, slowly.
As I strive to share my own brand-new experiences in KC to as a service to You, the wonderful devotees of New Vrindavan and all other soldier-children of Krsna who come to our website, I hope whatever naive stumbles and flat out flags of false-ego that I fly might help you to examine your own anarthas in a better light.
Please feel free to respond to this week’s piece with your own experiences as a brand-new devotee. I’m going to be selfish and say I am hoping for these personal memories of yours as a way to shed some air upon my own current struggles.
A devotee cannot survive without proper association. A devotee should always beg and seek for such association.
Keepin it somewhat real (still 16 rounds every day!)
from Harper Woods, Michigan
seein ya soon
your humble servant
Bhatka-Chris
